Mayan apocalypse

End of the world is here

Armageddon

2012 Doomsday



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11-11-11: One hell of a date for a great apocalypse. Let's do it! Friday, November 11, 2011 / 05:27:48 / Predictions
There have been some wankers recently, who have claimed that the end of the world is going to be (well, or actually, as the date has already past now, was) on October 21, 2011. This date was set by kinda delusional Harold Camping who initially claimed the date would be May 21, 2011. But considering I'm still here (or am I?), he must have been full of crap. Fortunately, we know better, a lot better. Look at today's date, 11-11-11. If you turn the date upside down, it will read 11-11-11 - have... read more
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Great news! The end is today - October 5, 2009 Monday, October 5, 2009 / 03:34:34 / Apocalypse news
I just received news from our outer-galaxy nonsense texting service that the end is near. You have around 12 more hours to live. The end will be caused by a big fart somewhere in the Milky Way galaxy. Some think it will be god who'll do the farting, but others don't believe in god, those atheist morons. They believe it will be a big fat man from Carolina. One way or another, the prediction is in and now we have nothing else to do than wait. Should we be unfortunate enough not to see the e... read more
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Join Klingon starship crew! Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:55:38 / Survive 2012
The world is coming to and end and it's the last time to start thinking about your future. Klingons from planet Klingon have offered their help in this matter. They are willing to take all interested people aboard their star ships as volunteer cabin crew! In order to reserve your spot, they do expect a good-will payment of $3300 just to show that you really are interested. This is not a refundable fee and doesn't guarantee a placement on Klingon star ship. Act now and reserve your spo... read more
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Maya indulgence for sale - now You can save the world! Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:54:08 / Apocalypse business
The human history has a lot of records that people have got help from buying the indulgences from churches and religious organizations. Just to buy some clear conscience. Mayas have done it differently - considering they were the ones who came out with the end of the world theory in 2012, then they are the ones who can change it as well. They have just issued a press release that if enough people (half the earths population) buys an indulgence from them, they will rewrite their calendar ... read more
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Urgent news - we must move half the planet to delay the pole shift! Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:51:25 / Apocalypse news
There has been a lot of talk over the potential pole reversal in 2012. If we're not crushed by the Planet X that is. According to the theories the poles will be reversed in a matter of minutes and this will be catastrophic to our planet! Instead of sitting on our asses waiting for the death to come, we have found a way to save us all. We must all move to the other side of the planet. We have not figured out which side yet, but we will soon. And once we do, half of the planet will need to mov... read more
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Insurance for end of the world - the best 2012 insurance is here! Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:50:30 / Apocalypse business
End of the world in 2012 is not really a fact, but the likelihood of it happening is great. In order to help you cope with the end of the world, we have created a new insurance product for you. In case the end of the world really happens, you can be sure all of your properties, clothes and live stock will be safe. You won't be here after the end anymore, but your precious possessions will keep living their own life. How does it work? We have discovered a way to give your possessions a consc... read more
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Don't worry about the Armageddon, buy your real estate on Planet X! Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:47:38 / Apocalypse business
We don't have a lot of time anymore. The year 2012 is nearing with a speed of light and it's pretty much the last moment to start thinking about it. One thing is sure - the earth as we know it will be crushed by Planet X like a small slutty bug. Spending your money on real estate on earth is a major waste of your hard earned cash. The real estate for the world after 2012 is available now - buy your land on Planet x! Yes, we know it's crushing into earth but we also know it's a lot stronger pl... read more
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Mayan calendar - a short introduction and why 2012 Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:45:43 / Mayas
We, the normal people, have a calendar which has 365 days in a year. The Mayan calendar had 20 periods of which all had 13 days. One Mayan cycle equals 52 of our years. The Mesoamerican Long Count calendar was created to measure dates over periods that are longer than 52 years. This calendar identifies the exact date by counting the number of days from August 11, 3114 BCE in the proleptic Gregorian calendar or September 6 in the Julian calendar. Okay...but do we really understand that May... read more
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The mystery of 2012 - predictions, prophecies and possibilities Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:44:34 / Mayas
The 2012 mystery, prediction, or wishful thinking - take it as you want, is an idea that apocalyptic, world changing events will take place in 2012. The date December 21, 2012 is a claimed end of world date by the interpretators of Mayan calendar (also known as Mesoamerican Long Count calendar). Mayan Calendar lasted 5125 years and it's about to end on December 21, 2012. And of course, that's something that makes it a potential end of times date. The date of apocalypse, Armageddon, dooms... read more
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Why can't we see Planet X? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:42:52 / Planet X
First of all, all of you out there, you must understand that only, and I mean only educated eyes will be able to see Planet X. "The naked eye will begin to register increased brightness approximately 1 year 7 months before the cataclysms. This appearance will be discounted by most, who will point to the distortions in the atmosphere as a cause or will explain this as an exploding star, the light rays of which are just becoming visible on Earth." or "When the Zetas state it is visible w... read more
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Is planet X Nibiru or really just Planet X? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:41:26 / Planet X
Does planet X exist? Of course, there are different theories, but we say Yes. Does Nibiru exist? Well, that's another question. Planet X has actually always been the name for an unknown planet. Kinda similar to Jane Doe or John Doe for an unknown person (well, usually a dead guy, but it's not a rule). Mars has been a planet X at some point, same for Pluto which was Planet X for years, and also Neptune. The name Planet X comes from the 70's when the name was used the most - name for unknown. ... read more
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What is Planet X? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:40:14 / Planet X
Planet X (Nibiru) was first seen by astronomers in the 1980's and it is a planet located in the outermost reaches of the Solar System. It is allegedly now speeding toward us and is going to crush us all...when else than 2012. And the results will obviously be devastating. That's the theory anyway, but does planet X as the nutcases see it, even exist? The reality is that the find on astronomers infrared "camera" looked like a red planet, but they really weren't sure of it. It could have been ... read more
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I am thy Antichrist! Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:38:16 / Bible
Ya'll Satan worshipers, bible fanatics and lovers of the doggystyle, I have come here today to back up the claims that the Antichrist is coming. I am thy Antichrist! Shiver if you want to, dance if you like, use me as your postal service to hell (one letter equals two years in hell, right). I don't really know much about god, we never got along too well. You see, we were actually brothers both produced by the same sperm burst caused by a great explosion couple of universes away from our univ... read more
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Apocalypse of John - the bible revelations Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:35:06 / Bible
The book of revelations, Apocalypse of John or however else you want to call it describes what some might call the end of the world. As none of the bible books should be take literally (considering it's really a badly written sci-fi book) then who knows what it actually means, maybe just the end of the age, but the main point is that Satan's rule through man is destroyed by the Messiah (that's me). The End.... read more
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Is Pope the White Horseman? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:34:19 / Bible
Well, just a question. Read the following with the pope in mind: Revelation 19:11-16 (KJV) And I saw heaven opened, and behold a white horse; and he that sat upon him was called Faithful and True, and in righteousness he doth judge and make war. His eyes were as a flame of fire, and on his head were many crowns; and he had a name written, that no man knew, but he himself. And he was clothed with a vesture dipped in blood: and his name is called The Word of God. And the armies which were in he... read more
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Bible prophecies are all about fear Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:33:27 / Bible
The most selling bestseller in universe is Bible. It's a fictional book based on the thoughts of many people who were oppressed by the emperors. In many cases, they had become true nutcases. And they started writing - it was like a compulsion, they just couldn't stop. And every once in a while they made some predictions, wrote down some prophecies into the bible. Just for fun. Just to keep themselves awake. The bible predicts that the Antichrist will arrive and conquer and destroy numerous co... read more
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Nibiru collision - yes, the impact would be devistating Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:31:31 / Planet X
The cumming and the too strong relationship between the two planets, earth and Nibiru, is too strong for us, the living species, to stay alive, and the collision will occur on 2012. It's supposed to be a full orgasm or a close call. Either way we'll be fucked. If the planet x exists at all that is. That's the first question. And the second one is the question of the collision. The theory (or fact for the nutcases) that a planet or a planet-sized object (call it a piece of sperm sent by Ni... read more
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Planet X is going to kill us in 2012 Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:30:53 / Planet X
First of all, what's a planet X? In the most simplistic terms, it's fictional planet created by a guy who allegedly received the information about Nibiru (the planet x) from extraterrestrials who abducted him. Okay, maybe Dr Jaysen Rand (Ph.D, well, like all the nutcases), wasn't the first one to come up with the planet X theory but he's definitely one of them. His book titled "The Return of Planet X" should say it all. More known/respected author about the Nibiru is Zecharia Sitchin. He says... read more
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More signs of end of the world Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:29:48 / Signs
Bible gives you a lot a mentions about the signs of end of the world. Only some of them are famine, wars and all that crap. Bible also says how we will be acting in the end days and some people believe we have been acting like that since 1900s. So the end MUST be near. The bible says that "men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, self-assuming, haughty, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, disloyal, having no natural affection, not open to any agreement, slanderers, with... read more
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The apocalypse is coming, what are the signs? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:28:12 / Signs
Obviously, the best sign for apocalypse that has already arrived, would be to see us all dead. But who'd be watching? So instead, let's look at the signs we might see before the total destruction of the universe. First of all, of course - when someone comes to you and says that he's the Antichrist, it's definitely a sign. The same goes for Jesus Christ - if you see him, just run like hell. Other signs we might see - famines (hmm, check), earthquakes (check), pestilences (bird flu and other... read more
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End of the world because he was picking his nose! Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:27:07 / Theories
It's his fault! I don't know who that was, but I found an answer to why the world actually ends - "I have a booger theory that is a fact. You see, when I pick my nose, I lose mass, altering the gravitational effect I have on everything in the universe. Since gravity is inverse square, then when I pick my nose, a unicorn in the Andromeda galaxy dies... it's chaos theory."... read more
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Bible armageddon - what does the bible say? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:26:28 / Bible
So what does the bible say about the Armageddon? Bible mentions Armageddon only once in revelation 16:16. "And they gathered them together to the place called in Hebrew, Armageddon." And the Bible makes no specific prediction about the date or anything else related about the war war fought at Armageddon (it means "the hill of Megiddo") between two human armies precisely at Christ's return. There will just be a war at some point in the future when all the unbelievers will be gracefully kill... read more
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The end of the world in 2012 caused by UK or USA? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:25:29 / Theories
The year 2012 is important as we all know. Now, in addition to the end of the world and stuff, there are two just a bit more important events happening in 2012 as well. One of them is Summer Olympics in 2012 and the other is presidential election in USA. And if we think about a cause-result effect, which one of them is more likely to cause the world to end? Which of them is most likely to cause the prediction of Mayan apocalypse to become a reality? I believe we all know the answer. It's t... read more
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Mayan theories about astrology and stuff Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:24:57 / Mayas
Mayans were an ancient culture good in maths and astrology. I don't know if astrology is a real science or not but they were still good at it. They believed that all the planets in the universe exert energy forces onto the earth and us on it, thus affecting our behavior and personalities. That was one of their theories, can we truly take it seriously? I tend to doubt it. And when talking about Mayas forecasting their own collapse then it's only half true. They were actually not right. Maya... read more
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Oneness - what's that all about? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:23:24 / Theories
I have talked about the change in our consciousness, I have talked that changes will occur. According to the nut theories that is. And one of them is oneness. On 2012, December 21 I guess, there is supposedly a period of about three minutes when something changes. If enough people are enlightened by that time, all living creatures will get the information, the changes. The energy transfer called deeksha physically changes our brains to help us perceive the shift. After that there won't b... read more
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Facts about the end of the world Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:22:35 / Theories
We have all heard about a lot of theories and supposed facts about the end of the world, but do they actually have any truth in them. Here are some almost facts for you: Planet X, as you have heard about it, does not exist. And how can something that does not exist crush earth? Earth's poles are switching, that's a fact. But it can't happen in a day, the process takes thousansa of years and this slow process doesn't kill anyone. Earth will not be sucked into a black hole - the closest bla... read more
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Schumann Resonance - what does that have to do with 2012? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:21:18 / Theories
For the religious nuts - everything. As do everything else they use to try to convince us that the world is coming to an end in 2012. First of all though, I bet some of you (hell, even I could use some help) have no idea what Schumann resonance is. "The Schumann resonances (SR) are a set of spectrum peaks in the extremely low frequency (ELF) portion of the Earth's electromagnetic field spectrum. Schumann resonances are global electromagnetic resonances, excited by lightning discharges in the... read more
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Apocalypse theories revisited Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:20:17 / Theories
We can't say for certain that the world is NOT going to end within our life time. I'm not saying that all apocalypse theories are false...well, most of them are moronic, but some of them might make sense at times. For example, a giant meteor could crush us. Millions of years ago the earth was continuously bombarded with meteors. In order to kill everything on earth, the meteor wouldn't even have to be too big....10-100km in diameter could already do the trick. Yes, there is a difference betw... read more
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The shifting of earth's magnetic poles - is this the direct cause for the end of the world? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:18:47 / Theories
The theory by the end-worlders is that in 2012 we will be facing another pole reversal on earth which results the north pole to be changed into a south pole and vice versa. And this will result in the opposite-direction rotation of earth. They say that sudden reversals and pole shifts are natural to the Earth. But the result of such reversals is world destruction. The scientific theory, however, is that the magnetic poles are shifting around continuously and currently it is about 5 degrees aw... read more
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End of world theories - are they for real? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:17:40 / Theories
There have been hundreds if not thousands of different end of world theories. And so far, they have all been false. They have all been false alarms, they have all been sick thoughts of strange individuals hoping for or being afraid of the end. Of course, the doomsayers always say that the next date will be for real, but...come on! Haven't you had enough already? There are Mayas...or actually our interpretation of what Mayas thought. There are biblical end theories, hell and Antichrist, there'... read more
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Cosmic ordering of solar system after 26 000 years? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:16:06 / Theories
Allegedly, in 2012, the plane of the solar system will be lining up with with Milky Way. The last time this happened was 26 000 ago and another cycle ends in 2012. It just might happen that couple of other galaxies will be lining up with our galaxy as well, turning it into a cosmic ordering event! And many people do think that once that happens again, it will be the end of us all. Yet, considering the potential number of stars and galaxies out there, chances are that every given moment mi... read more
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Future predictions and prophecies of end times Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:15:34 / Predictions
What do all the future predictions, prophecies and all other weird things have in common? They are all just predictions, estimations, imaginations, illusions, fantasies, wishful thinkings. We can't have exact predictions for the future simply because we don't even know what we ourselves are going to do tomorrow. So how can you predict anything about the entire world? The world consists of billions of people, trillions (or maybe googleplex) of insects and so on. Each of them are influenced dir... read more
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What did Mayans say about 2012? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:13:28 / Mayas
In addition to the interpretations about the end of the world in 2012, Mayans also predicted that by 2012 the technology will develop beyond what we know now. Gosh! Our technology developed beyond what Mayans knew already a hundred years ago. We will become spiritual beings - time and money ain't that essential or existent..well. Our DNA will be upgraded like you get automatic upgrades to your Windows. Except that instead of Bill Gates, the center of the galaxy will be doing the job. ... read more
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Mayan predictions about 2012 Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:12:39 / Predictions
Mayas allegedly claim that December 21, 2012 is the day time as we know it will end. For Mayas, the day 21-12-2012 was not just a day like it might be for most of us. "On that day the sun will sit precisely on the heavenly crossroads between milky way and galactic equinox, forming a perfect alignment with the center of the galaxy." That's the interpretation of Mayas stuff by today's prophet's any how. There is one fact though that even I won't say is bullshit. The fact is that Mayas did know ... read more
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2012 - the self-fulfilling prophesy? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:11:20 / Theories
If you have read my previous posts and articles, you have probably come to the conclusion that I don't really go for the 2012 end of the world mambo-jambo. But I do believe in logic, logical line of events that may lead to the end of the world (at least to the end of the world as we know it). And one of them is 2012 as the self fulfilling prophesy. No, I don't seriously think the world will end on 2012, one way or another. But I do want you to think about what could happen if enough people b... read more
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Predictions of Nostradamus - and who was he? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:10:14 / Predictions
Nostradamus is a famous guy - he was allegedly the best Nostradamus ever! Nostradamus was an astrologer, astronomer, physician and a...hmm, prophet? He wrote his predictions in the form of quatrains allegedly in order to keep his prophecies obscured from the Christian church. What's a quatrain? It's a train on four weels...well, almost. It's a four-line poem. He actually did it just to complicate things. Nostradamus became known among the people because he started writing horoscopes for th... read more
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What are the bases of the predictions of 2012? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:07:38 / Predictions
The believers of the end of the world in 2012 believe that we are all going through a shift in consciousness. Well, I guess they (you?) most likely believe that by the end of the day, we'll all believe. They believe that the Mayans have so far been the most advanced civilization when it comes to time and science. And well, we can't forget divinity, of course. Allegedly, Mayan fifth world ended back in 1987 and the sixth is starting 2012. And it's called Apocalypse, well, allegedly. And if... read more
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Bad predictions - is there a market for them? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:06:52 / Predictions
Simple answer is NO. But I have mentioned it before, and I will mention it again. There are no such things as a bad or wrong predictions. There are only predictions that have been written down in a wrong way. When you take a piece of wood, do something of it, paint it red and write its name on it - that's no way to predict. That's the way you'd explain people what you have just done...obviously you're a bad sculptor, but that's already another story. When predicting, you need to leave as m... read more
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Mayan calendar - it's all about the divine plan Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:04:59 / Mayas
When you look at the image of Mayan calendar, it seems like a weird piece of art. At first glance, that's something that makes it difficult to understand it...or even consider it a calendar. Yes, some say it's not difficult to understand it independent of the initial reaction most of us have when we look at Maya's masterpiece. The believers of Mayan calendar tend to say that the main reason why we don't understand the calendar, is that we have all been living in a materialist world resulting... read more
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Predictions for the future - how to become a Nostradamus? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 05:03:16 / Predictions
Human kind as a whole has made a gigantic, gigantum (whatever) number of predictions for the future. We have a number of famous predictioning people, such as Nostradamus. And we have a number of people not fortunate enough to be as famous as Nostradamus. What does it take to make world predictions what will actually work? You need to be an educated man and be able to see beyond what's visible. No, I'm not talking about God or the sperm tube. I am talking about imagination, fantasy. And yo... read more
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God's plan - does a divine plan exist? Friday, September 25, 2009 / 04:50:35 / Bible
The believers in the god's plan would insist that yes, it does exist. That the future belongs to those who believe and who are willing to go with the flow...well, I go with the flow but they want me to go with the divine plan. Really, should I really? They believe that I will understand everything once I read the bible...but not only, when we talk about the divine plan in the process of the end of the world in 2012, I should familiarize myself with the Mayan calendar as well. I must admi... read more
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There are signs that the world will end ca. 4,500,000,000 AD / End dates
The sun will swell into a red giant star, swallowing Mercury, Venus, Earth, and perhaps Mars. This will be the true end of the world! ... read more
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There are signs that the world will end 2040 / End dates
Pyramidologist Max Toth predicts the physical reincarnation of Jesus Christ occurring in 2040. Like other pyramidologists, he used the dimensions of the Great Pyramid's passageways to predict future events. (Weber p.195) John Smart of ... read more
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The world is about to end 2037 / End dates
In her book The Call to Glory, psychic Jeane Dixon wrote, "The years 2020-2037, approximately, hail the true Second Coming of Christ." The Battle of Armageddon is to take place in 2020. (Dixon p.170, 172) ... read more
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There are signs that the world will end 2035 / End dates
The Raëlians are working hard to establish an embassy in Jerusalem in anticipation of the 2035 arrival of aliens called "elohim", who will usher in a New Age. However, their arrival is contingent on the completion of the embassy. (Robbins p.164) ... read more
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2033 is the end of everything / End dates
Believed by many to by the 2000th anniversary of the Crucifixion, this is a date just begging to be targeted by doomsayers whose prophecies for 2000 and 2001 will have failed. ... read more
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We are all going to die Nov 13, 2026 / End dates
According to an article published in Science magazine in 1960, this was the date that the world's population would reach infinity. (Source: Jacksonville.com) ... read more
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We are all going to die 2025 / End dates
In this post, Georgann Chenault, a frequent poster on Usenet, wrote "I think the rapture of the church will be before 2025." ... read more
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Total armageddon will occur 2023 / End dates
Ian Gurney predicts in his book The Cassandra Prophecy - Armageddon Approaches that the "final date, Judgement Day, the end of mankind's time on this planet, is less than twenty two years away" from 2001, which means that the world is set to end by 2023 at the very latest. The entirety of his website can be seen here. ... read more
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The world is about to end 2022 / End dates
James T. Harmon's Rapture prediction #4. (Oropeza p.89) ... read more
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We are all going to die!

You will die sooner than I do though.

I believe in god you know, you'll end up in hell!

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha HAAAAAAhok!

Okay, seriously, are we gonna die?